Noëlle the 8-Bit🏳️🌈🎄
It is REALLY HARD to not think of myself in terms of what I can do. And when I run across someone who can do everything I care about better than I can, it's REALLY HARD for me to not think that it would just be better if I stepped aside and didn't bother anymore.
I KNEW I should have immediately followed up posting this toot by muting responses to it.
If I could convince Mastodon at large of only one thing, it would be this:
if you see someone complaining, DO NOT give them advice.
If someone ASKS for advice, offer it.
But 90% of the time, someone complaining is just venting. They're not telling you the whole story, and they're not receptive to being given advice, because in that mental state, your "good-natured advice" is their "HERE'S HOW YOU'RE DOING THIS WRONG".
Do not respond with advice unless it's asked for.
@noelle This is good advice for life in general. Now when my wife is talking about something I explicitly ask "Do you want me to try to help you fix this, or do you just want a hug?" She does the same for me.
But doing it in the fediverse would be a good start.
